Ever since I was born, I’ve loved you as big as the sky, my dear father. When I was little, I used to listen to music with you. The melody of the songs filled the room, and our knowing glances would meet. I’d go to the hardware store with you to buy the screws we needed to fix a piece of furniture or build a wall. I did my homework with you. I was lucky to have a modern dad. I learned to cook with you. I loved watching you make dinner so much. I watched TV with you. I could invite my friends over without feeling self-conscious because you were so funny. You’d drive me anywhere, anytime. You taught me that being sensitive can be beautiful. That men cry too, and that’s totally okay.
I’ve always been able to count on you. At 3 a.m., drunk, whether I was 16 or 28, I’d call you and you’d be there. Without judgment. When I’d fight with my boyfriend and needed someone to listen, you were there. When my kids drove me crazy and I just couldn’t take it anymore, you were there. You’re as good a grandfather as you were a father.
I’ve had so many wonderful, happy moments with you. Unforgettable conversations in the kitchen. Home renovations. Days spent outdoors, at the cabin, or on the ski slopes. I love listening to you when you tell me about things I don’t know. You explain them to me with such patience.
You’ve always been there for me. But lately, life has really put you through the wringer. You’ve faced more than one tough blow—and not just minor ones. I’ve been there for you, but not as much as I would have liked. I didn’t feel like I was up to the task. I wasn’t as present as I would have liked to be. I even asked you for help and advice when you were at your lowest. And that’s when I realized that the strongest person is my dad. Because my dad doesn’t fall. Or hardly ever. My dad can take a lot. My dad gets through tough times. My dad, even at his lowest, thinks about my well-being. I wish I could have told you that it’s okay not to always be the strongest. When I saw you at your lowest, I didn’t know how to comfort you. I’d always seen my dad at his best, and there I was seeing him fall. I was at a loss.
Now I see you differently, Dad. Now, with my own children and as I’ve gotten older, I realize just how lucky I’ve been to have a dad like you. I’ve had wonderful years with you, and you know what? I hope we have many, many more. Because my relationship with you just gets so much better with each passing year. I love you, my dear, beloved dad. And know that if life throws a few more curveballs your way, I’ll be there. Even if I don’t feel up to the task, I’ll be there.