Of all the things people forgot to tell me before I became a mom, the one I’m sharing here is one of the most important. So make a note for your next mom-to-be get-together, or give your cousin a special baby shower gift—and be sure to talk about the void.
No, not “emptiness” like a pint of milk left in the fridge or a roll of toilet paper forgotten after wiping one last time. “Emptiness” in the sense that no one in your household will pay any attention to the sweet words coming out of your mouth. Your advice and instructions will be very skillfully dodged by the kids, who always have better things to do or discover. Your thrilling stories won’t be able to hold the attention of your charming sweetheart, who’s too busy fiddling with some trinket while you’re talking to him.
Your kids will ask you to stop singing along with your favorite singer, but don’t worry—it’s not because you sing badly; it’s just because it’s you singing. You’ll tell yourself it’s quicker to go get your two-year-old from the living room and put his pajamas on yourself than to wait 20 minutes for him and realize he hasn’t even taken off one sock.
You’ll realize you’re talking to yourself when you’ve reminded your daughter 15 times that she needs to go pee and then you see her peeing on the living room rug while she’s doing a puzzle. You’ll realize you’re talking to yourself when you ask your boyfriend what he’d like to eat and he replies, “Oh, really?”
You’ll realize you’re talking to yourself when you ask your kids, “What did I just say?” and they reply, “I don’t know,” even though they were right in front of you when you spoke to them.
I realize that most of what I say every day falls on deaf ears. But I give myself the right not to repeat myself when I’m sick of saying the same thing three times, and I choose to say, “I did warn you,” when someone’s head hits the corner of the table.
Deep down, I have the right not to listen either… sometimes… so they’ll learn.
Warn the moms-to-be in your circle, arm yourselves with patience, and keep telling yourselves that you’re amazing.
Did you hear that?