A message for absent fathers and mothers facing this sad situation...
Your indifference toward your children hurts. Your indifference to their sadness over your absence is heartbreaking. When you left their mother, you also decided to leave your children. It’s as if they’ve become a burden to you. They prevent you from being completely free.
Your indifference when they’re sick or when they call out for you breaks their mother’s heart. You’re conspicuously absent on their birthdays or other special days in their lives. You may think you’re just hurting their mother with your actions, but in reality, you’re hurting them, and their mother weeps to see you inflicting these wounds on your children.
Your indifference to the importance of providing them with a home and ensuring their well-being is staggering. You prefer a handful of money to their comfort and the attachment they feel to their home. You’d rather force them to move to make money for your own well-being without a thought for your children’s. You’ve chosen dollars over their happiness.
Your indifference to sharing special moments with them is hurtful. You’d rather call a babysitter for the day on your weekend so you can go out with your friends and have a beer. You’re in a hurry to leave even though you’ve only just arrived. When you’re with them, you’d rather “gamble” than play. Do you realize that these four precious days a month will never come back?
Your indifference toward your two children deeply upsets the people around you. What are we supposed to make of the fact that you’d rather insult their mother for no reason than spend your weekend with them? What is she supposed to tell your children to explain your absence yet again? What message are people supposed to take from your behavior? You’re leaving their mother to raise your children on her own, on top of emotionally abandoning them through your absence and your lack of affection toward them.
Your indifference affects your children’s lives. What should we tell your children when they ask for you or wait for you, and you don’t show up? How should we address their insecurity about your place in their lives? What will you say in a few years when they ask you questions? And how will you react when, in turn, they aren’t there for you when you need them? One day, you will have lost your place in their hearts.