My spouse and I discussed it, and we had several reasons why we didn't want visitors at the hospital. Looking back, we don't regret it.
When I was pregnant, I learned not to feel self-conscious about my body around the hospital staff. It’s their job, after all. My partner’s horrified expression during my last two pushes was enough for me. I wanted to be able to walk around in a tank top, without a bra, and in Tena, well, that's nice and easy.
We wanted to be able to enjoy the first 24 hours with our daughter on our own before introducing her to our families and friends. Yes, it’s selfish, but hospitals keep us there for about 36 hours, unless there’s a problem. Thirty-six hours is nothing! I’ve been carrying our child for 40 weeks—our family and friends can wait a few more hours.
I didn't want to experience that overwhelming feeling I'd had when my sister gave birth a few years ago. There were just too many of us there at once. I felt bad about being there when she was so exhausted. On top of that, I felt like I was getting in the way of the nurses who were just doing their jobs.
After giving birth, I was exhausted! I gave it everything I had to get that little one out of my body. On top of that, there was feeding… Since I was breastfeeding, I fed the baby on demand, but let’s just say the nurses pushed to make sure the intervals didn’t exceed 4 hours. No matter how long it takes you to breastfeed, the 4-hour window starts from the beginning of one feeding until the next one begins. So, I didn’t really get 4 hours of sleep between each feeding.
We received a lot of information during our stay. The nurses gave us the training whenever they had time, because, you know, we weren’t the only ones in the maternity ward. The information the nurses give you is very important—postnatal follow-ups for mom and baby and all the administrative details surrounding a birth.
It gave us time to get to know our baby—why she was crying, how she reacted, and what she needed. Every child is different. It’s a big adjustment, both in the hospital and once we got home. So we wanted to get to know our little one.
So, if I decide to have a visitor—whether a family member or a friend—please don’t take it the wrong way. It’s my delivery; ultimately, it’s my decision, not yours. Please respect that, because I don’t have the energy to deal with people being upset at the hospital. Not even my partner has the final say, because I’m the one who brought this little wonder into the world. We’ll already have to manage visitors at home, but that’s another story!